Words cannot describe the weirdness of the clip below. My friend, Matt Decoster alerted me to the short and I cannot imagine how a straight man found this gift from the YouTube gods.
The song will make you want to join a cult. Even if you don't watch the whole thing fast forward to about 1:30 to see the most realistic portrayal of gay lovemaking I have ever encountered.
And I am not sure what the message is beyond if you have sex after a horrible hate crime, wear a condom.
Enjoy!
Simple and Sarcastic. Swoon.
The new Tylenol "Feel Better" ads that seem to be challenging Brett Gelman's "Little Bit of Luck" for title of NYC's most ubiquitous ads, are very Captain Obvious. They offer helpful advice such as "when you're hungry eat" and "if you can't sleep take a sleeping pill." Not exactly groundbreaking advertising.
So imagine my delight when I stumbled on this simple and perfectly snarky graffiti.
Genius. I love the correct punctuation. I love the simplicity. And I love that someone crossed out "Tylenol" and added a tag. Like we're to believe that Tylenol no longer makes Tylenol. Clean pink slippers. An added bonus.
So imagine my delight when I stumbled on this simple and perfectly snarky graffiti.
"If you're sick, GENIUS take a sick day."
Genius. I love the correct punctuation. I love the simplicity. And I love that someone crossed out "Tylenol" and added a tag. Like we're to believe that Tylenol no longer makes Tylenol. Clean pink slippers. An added bonus.
Eliot: Spitzer or 'ET?
I saw this ad for keeping it green where someone wrote "Why Eliot?" I guess because of the bike my immediate thought was "this person is obsessed with 'ET' the movie." Then, to quote my sophomore English teacher who died from complications due to alcoholism, 'light dawns on marble head." Eliot Spitzer. Who boinked a whore and had to quit his job...as governor. I get it!
Enjoy the graffiti the way Eliot enjoyed that $4,000 hummer!
Enjoy the graffiti the way Eliot enjoyed that $4,000 hummer!
David Paterson Likes Sex Too!
The new New York State governor, David Paterson has admitted to having extra-martial affairs. Unlike many of these situations, his wife admitted to getting some on the side which makes the ERA feminist in me smile with glee.
According to the "Daily News," Paterson said
The DAYS INN!
I love this guy. This is EXACTLY who I want governing New York. Paterson knows enough to not pay for something (sex) you can get for free. And when he does get it he does it bargain style at the Days Inn.
I can't wait for updates on the budget talks!
According to the "Daily News," Paterson said
he and the other woman sometimes stayed at an upper West Side hotel — the Days Inn at Broadway and W. 94th St.
The DAYS INN!
I love this guy. This is EXACTLY who I want governing New York. Paterson knows enough to not pay for something (sex) you can get for free. And when he does get it he does it bargain style at the Days Inn.
I can't wait for updates on the budget talks!
St Patty's Day Aftermath
That tall Dr. Seuss Guniess hat seems so fun when the evening starts.
Wearing it alone at 1 am on the subway seems less fun.
Wearing it alone at 1 am on the subway seems less fun.
OBSESSED: This Thursday!
OBSESSED WITH JULIE & JACKIE
This Thursday don't miss OBSESSED!
Thursday, March 13th at 9:30 PM
UCB Theater NY | 307 West 26th Street @ 8th Ave
212.366.9176 | http://ucbtheater.com for rezzies
$5 bucks
This month:
OBSESSED Goes Commercial
Featuring your favorite shills:
Adira Amram
Brett Gelman "Little Bit of Luck"
Stoley (who will be singing the IO Digital Cable jingle, for your enjoyment)
& Jawnee Conroy (who is in an ad with "Soprano's" Paulie Walnuts)
PLUS my collection of photos of myself around the city with LITTLE BIT OF LUCK! Here's a sample!
This Thursday don't miss OBSESSED!
Thursday, March 13th at 9:30 PM
UCB Theater NY | 307 West 26th Street @ 8th Ave
212.366.9176 | http://ucbtheater.com for rezzies
$5 bucks
This month:
OBSESSED Goes Commercial
Featuring your favorite shills:
Adira Amram
Brett Gelman "Little Bit of Luck"
Stoley (who will be singing the IO Digital Cable jingle, for your enjoyment)
& Jawnee Conroy (who is in an ad with "Soprano's" Paulie Walnuts)
PLUS my collection of photos of myself around the city with LITTLE BIT OF LUCK! Here's a sample!
Brett Favre Cries, Jackie Gets Turned On
Green Bay Packer QB, Brett Favre retired from football after 17 years in the NFL, 16 of them with the Packers. Favre held a press conference (see below) and displayed one of my favorite emotions: tough-guy trying not to cry.
Sure Favre is a great player and a pretty likable guy. He was great in "There's Something About Mary." I'm a Pats girl, not a Packer fan, I don't care so much about his retirement. When Tom Brady retires I will certainly shed some tears. I started watching the press conference just to have something on as white-noise. Then I became transfixed.
Here are some highlights:
0:15: We are a scant 15 seconds into the press conference and Favre shows his first sign of emotion. He does the ole "shake it off" trick. When that doesn't work he scratches his nose a bunch. You're not fooling us, Brett! You don't have a booger. You're gonna weep. When the scratching doesn't work he makes a "zurrrbrpt" sounds with his lips. Yup, a "zurrrbrpt" sound. If you don't believe me, watch.
Then he says, "I promised myself I wouldn't get emotional." I feel for him here. I make promises with myself I never keep: I promised myself I wouldn't have that second bottle of wine, I promised myself to sleep only 10 hours tonight, I promised myself not to place Ebay bids on clothes I already own...I feel your pain, Brett!
0:29: Ok, this is probably my favorite part in the whole thing and the reason why I wanted to write this post in the first place. Favre is trying to say "I hope that every penny that they [Packers] spent on me, they know was money well spent." It takes him 37 seconds to say this sentence. 37 seconds! I clocked myself saying this a few times and every time I said it, I came in under 10 seconds. He took nearly four times the average time to say it! (I am deeming my test the "average" for this post.) Brett actually takes a 20 second pause to try to collect himself. And he fails beautifully.
What does he do in his 20 second pause?
- He snorts. I mean a serious snotty snort. He breathes in and out a few times then sucks in a mad snort. And guess what? It is not disgusting. It is one of the sexiest things I've ever seen. (Why is repressed emotion so hot? I don't think I want to know the answer I am sure it is some sort of Elecktra/Daddy thing hardwired in my brain. I've got to remind myself to NOT bring this to therapy.)
- He covers his mouth
- He presses his eyes...He is physically trying to keep his sadness/tears in. That's an athlete for you, trying to control the body.
- Back to the mouth
- Big exhale
- Time to fix my collar!
- Sniffles
- Breathing
- Look to the heavens
4:11: More sniffing and snorting.
I guess one of things that is so interesting about a man crying is we glimpse into how he would act during sex. Crying, like sex, is intimate and vulnerable. So when Brett Favre gets all emotional one can imagine him in a delicate moment with the same intensity and passion. And, of course, it is now easy to imagine him crying after sex.
Sure Favre is a great player and a pretty likable guy. He was great in "There's Something About Mary." I'm a Pats girl, not a Packer fan, I don't care so much about his retirement. When Tom Brady retires I will certainly shed some tears. I started watching the press conference just to have something on as white-noise. Then I became transfixed.
Here are some highlights:
0:15: We are a scant 15 seconds into the press conference and Favre shows his first sign of emotion. He does the ole "shake it off" trick. When that doesn't work he scratches his nose a bunch. You're not fooling us, Brett! You don't have a booger. You're gonna weep. When the scratching doesn't work he makes a "zurrrbrpt" sounds with his lips. Yup, a "zurrrbrpt" sound. If you don't believe me, watch.
Then he says, "I promised myself I wouldn't get emotional." I feel for him here. I make promises with myself I never keep: I promised myself I wouldn't have that second bottle of wine, I promised myself to sleep only 10 hours tonight, I promised myself not to place Ebay bids on clothes I already own...I feel your pain, Brett!
0:29: Ok, this is probably my favorite part in the whole thing and the reason why I wanted to write this post in the first place. Favre is trying to say "I hope that every penny that they [Packers] spent on me, they know was money well spent." It takes him 37 seconds to say this sentence. 37 seconds! I clocked myself saying this a few times and every time I said it, I came in under 10 seconds. He took nearly four times the average time to say it! (I am deeming my test the "average" for this post.) Brett actually takes a 20 second pause to try to collect himself. And he fails beautifully.
What does he do in his 20 second pause?
- He snorts. I mean a serious snotty snort. He breathes in and out a few times then sucks in a mad snort. And guess what? It is not disgusting. It is one of the sexiest things I've ever seen. (Why is repressed emotion so hot? I don't think I want to know the answer I am sure it is some sort of Elecktra/Daddy thing hardwired in my brain. I've got to remind myself to NOT bring this to therapy.)
- He covers his mouth
- He presses his eyes...He is physically trying to keep his sadness/tears in. That's an athlete for you, trying to control the body.
- Back to the mouth
- Big exhale
- Time to fix my collar!
- Sniffles
- Breathing
- Look to the heavens
4:11: More sniffing and snorting.
I guess one of things that is so interesting about a man crying is we glimpse into how he would act during sex. Crying, like sex, is intimate and vulnerable. So when Brett Favre gets all emotional one can imagine him in a delicate moment with the same intensity and passion. And, of course, it is now easy to imagine him crying after sex.
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